


Saccharine

by arancar_no_6



Category: Red vs. Blue
Genre: Bathing/Washing, Flirting, Fluff and Humor, Idiots in Love, Literal Sleeping Together, M/M, Romantic Fluff, Sweet
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-05
Updated: 2019-10-05
Packaged: 2020-11-23 23:30:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,212
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20897924
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/arancar_no_6/pseuds/arancar_no_6
Summary: Everybody could do with a little self-care. Luckily, Maine will do anything and everything that Wash could ever desire.





	Saccharine

**Author's Note:**

> *me quietly whispering dammit as I write another one of these things for these two idiots*
> 
> Heavily based on my own bedtime routine whenever I desperately need to pamper myself.

Wash moaned loudly and utterly unabashed as he entered the bath stall. “God, I love the water pressure in this place.” He cranked the shower head on and shoved his face directly into the spray, hair flattening as he tilted his head downwards. Water streamed down the bridge of his nose, quickly forming a pool that splashed at his feet.

The stall clicked shut behind him as Maine followed grunting, rolling stiff shoulders. He reached around Wash to turn the water up a little hotter, steam swirling around their bodies as his partner gave a relieved sigh, gifting him a very appreciative pat in the ass for his efforts. “Oh yeah, that's nice. Hey! No shoving, don't you know that's dangerous?”

Maine snorted at him, combing fingers through newly soaked hair.

Operating on little more than four hours of sleep and being thrust from assignment in the early hours straight into debriefing did things to people like them. Washington often fidgeted in place. He had the bad habit of twisting and tugging almost painfully at the short locks of hair tucked behind the shell of his ear, swaying on his feet as his sight roamed. Maine somehow grew quieter, jaw stiffening and completely unwilling to socialize in any measure. Stress set in quickly for him, an awful ache thrumming in his head, and Maine quickly became sensitive to the constant activity aboard the Mother; no amount of responsibly self-medicated painkillers helped.

Unfortunately it happened too often; it was an expectation as active Freelancers. On the other hand, it happened enough for them to be able to now deal with their exhaustion with effective means.

Maine yawned deeply, jaw cracking. Wash winced at the snap, audible despite the running water. He reached for the set of toiletries they got specifically for days like this, snapping open the bottle of shampoo. He deposited an absurd amount into his cupped palm, holding the open container out to his partner. “That's creepy. It doesn't hurt, does it?”

“Not really,” Maine's voice was all gravel, soft and reserved only for the little rookie. He received his own much more modest dollop of soap, dropped into a near perfect coin-sized shape into his hand. Maine hardly needed hair care, what with his preference for keeping his hair shorn and shaved down, but it was nevertheless nice.

They lathered themselves up in comfortable silence, occasionally bumping into one another as they took turns rinsing under the hot shower. Maine plucked the conditioner from Wash's slippery fingers, ignoring the offended pout. “You use too much.” He quickly ran the product through blond hair for him, neatly slicking it back and away from his face so it had a chance to sit.

“It's not as if you use any.”

“Don't need it.”

Wash blubbered incredulously. “Because you _refuse _to use it.”

“It's dumb.”

“It's good hair care routine, babe. Stops you from getting split ends.” The pet name slipped easily from his mouth as Maine drew him close, pulling Wash's arms to slip around his waist. Wash blinked stray droplets from his eyes, nearly melting as rough but gentle hands cupped his face. God, he loved it when Maine's hands were on him.

“_Dumb_,” Maine emphasized, pressing a kiss to the offended little wrinkle that quickly formed between Wash's brows. Wash made an affronted noise in the back of his throat, pulling a step away and bending down to scoop the next bath item up. Amused smiles quirked the corners of their mouths, now long since accustomed to each other's dry sense of humor.

It took another twenty minutes for them to finish scrubbing down, indulging in lathering up once more and the intimacy of helping one another wash up. Rich and creamy suds clung to their limbs, finally rinsed away for the final time as they stepped out from the shower rooms and into the locker rooms to dress, a waft of steam following in their wake.

“Come on sweetheart, we gotta be up in-” Maine stole a glance at the large military clock above the door frame with a pained groan, “six hours.”

“Oh my god why,” Washington drawled, knocking into his side as they strolled out in the direction of their quarters. The Mother was utterly empty, the blast of the oxygen circulation on full power chilling the ship halls. “Can we just not show up for lecture tomorrow morning? Please?” A sleepy set of eyes turned up to bat at Maine. “You can bully Georgia for the notes at dinner.”

“Stop trying to seduce me,” Maine drew a giggling Wash to his side with a heavy arm around his shoulders. They drew to a stop in front of a set of sleek elevators, nearly seamless against the M.O.I.'s paneled walls. Wash punched in the ten digit encrypted code for the Freelancers' reserved residential floor.

The ride down was smooth, F.L.I.S.S. admitting them to their floor with her usual smooth candor and a cheeky reminder of the late hour. Another code at the end of the and the couple finally slipped into their quarters with relieved sighs. Wash made a beeline for the dresser across the room, rummaging for the extra set of sheets in the topmost drawer. He brandished the stack of silky bedding with an excited noise, blindly hurling them at his lover's general direction as he bounded for the bed.

“Off, I want it all offfff-” Wash gripped the set of blankets and covers strewn across and tugged, bunching them in the corner. Maine didn't bother arguing; Wash always insisted on changing the entire bedding when indulging in a bedtime routine like this, refusing to sleep until they followed every mark.

The Spartan finally sunk into the made up bed with a relieved sigh. Okay, he'll concede; Freshly showered and newly laundered covers made a wonderful combination. He could feel himself dowsing, eyes slipping shut as his senses relaxed for the first time in days.

He snapped awake upon feeling petite hands patting and smoothing at his face.

Maine complained, gently swatting Wash away. “Don't want it.”

“It's just facial moisturizer, hon. It's not going to hurt you.” Wash took it upon himself to straddle his partner,firmly rubbing the remaining lotion clinging to his fingers into his brow. He snorted as the larger man fussed and turned away from him. “You're like a kid. Come on, stop movin-” Wash's demand was cut off with a yelp as he suddenly felt himself being lifted for the briefest of moments, landing on his back as Maine crawled over him.

“We're sleeping,” he ground out, leveling a stern look at the blond. “_Sleeping_.” He ignored the indignant squawk that followed, swinging the overs over their bodies and forcibly tucking Wash under his chin.

“You're no fun.” Wash nevertheless snuggled into his arms, humming at the warmth. He turned to press his ear to Maine's chest, the strong beat of his heart like the world's most soothing metronome. “I like you anyway.”

Wash could feel the amused breath in the crown of his head, the silence of the bedroom and security of being in the arms of his most favorite person in the world sending him into the world of sleep.

**Author's Note:**

> The mental image of Maine aggressively dodging Wash's attempts to get him to exfoliate twice a week and invest in chapstick gives me life.
> 
> Also I HC that it takes them a LONG TIME to say "I love you". They're dumb and shy and they're not gonna know what to do with themselves when the day comes so they just avoid it lmao. Maybe I'll write it; I have two other things in the works for mainewash, one of which didn't really go anywhere.


End file.
